Healthy touch and massage provides an avenue for meeting children’s emotional needs,strengthening attachment, and improving brain regulation. One of the ways the lower brain develops is through touch used in patterned, repetitive, rhythmic ways. Things that would normally be rewarding (i.e., a hug) to a person do not have the same affect on children who have experienced trauma. An unexpected hug can cause the fight or flight response in children who have experienced trauma or cause sensory overload. This child needs more predictable, healthy touch and without it, this will set her up to over-touch, overeat, and over-drink, etc. to get the rewards her brain needs.
We can try to fill up the child’s need with healthy interaction – the child needs enriched, relational engagement. If the child doesn’t get the relational reward her brain needs, her brain will seek it, until her reward threshold is satiated. These children need much more stimulation and attention in order for their reward threshold to be filled. More individual time, more touch, and basically more of everything relational will help these children.
How to begin using healthy touch with your child:
1. Always use touch with predictability and safety. Use a familiar place where the
family routinely connects (kitchen table), sitting up, lights on, clothes on, to
perform the massage. Be verbally explicit about what you’re doing so this child
can begin understanding the interaction. Begin with very simple shoulder massage
when she’s ready.
2. The key is to pattern the massages for the child (5-7 minute massages patterned
throughout the day.) I recommend massage prior to transitional times during
the day. What will be important in transformation of the brain is number of
repetitions and the pattern of the activity. It may be helpful to map out the actual
physical contacts that she receives.
3. Combine relationship and pleasure in utilizing healthy touch. Provide a “grounded
presence” for the child within yourself. Stroking away from heart promotes
relaxation, stroking toward the heart promotes stimulation. Stroking down
the spine supports brain integration. Come in slowly; let hand rest for a few
seconds, imagine her brain is being oriented to where the touch is occurring in her
body. Use a “resting hand” — make the connection, breathe, and then begin the
movement.
Additional Resource: Tiffany Fields, Ph.D. Touch Research Institute
Derived or reproduced from training provided by Kalena Babeshoff (2008), Founder of A Foundation For Healthy Family Living.
Parenting, Sensory Processing